THE ART OF SIDEWAYS! LESSON#3

CARvs.SPEEDBUMP

t0k

NEVER THOUGHT i WOULD BE IN THIS SITUATION….THAT MOMENT WHEN U SEE A STEEP INCLINE, BUMP, DECLINE, etc 😦

MY E36 WAS SLIGHTLY LOW, MY S6 WAS LOW, BUT NOW MY Z33’S NEW BUMPER HAS BROUGHT ME IN A TERRITORY THAT I THOUGHT I AVOIDED. YES I’M TALKING ABOUT HAVING A 2″ – 5″ GROUND  CLEARANCE. SOMETIMES i JUST DON’T WANT TO DRIVE MY CAR ANYMORE, I ALWAYS HAVE A FEELING THAT I WON’T BE ABLE TO MAKE IT THROUGH A ROAD TRIP. ALWAYS THINKING IF I’LL NEED TO PARK FAR AWAY, JUST TO GET TO THE DESTINATION I DROVE TO. THEN I REALIZED…..THE NINJA ART OF SIDEWAYS HAD TO BE MASTERED.
wARNING: 1. (MANUAL TRANS DRIVERS) DO NOT ATTEMPT THIS AFTER DOING A LEG OR LOWER BODY WORKOUT, YOU WILL FAIL……OR GET A CRAMP WHILE DOING IT.  2.) IF YOU DRIVE AN AUTOMATIC…GET A MANUAL (LOLJK) 3.) THE APPROACH OF THE TECHNIQUE IS UNIVERSAL, BUT DEPENDS CRITICALLY ON THE SITUATION (SPEED BUMP, DRIVEWAY INCLINE/DECLINE), ETC.

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STEPS:

1. KNOW YOUR SITUATION AND HISTORY: 1)WHAT CLEARANCE DO MY FRONT, REAR, SIDE SPOILERS HAVE, 2) CAN I ACCOMPLISH THE CHALLENGE WITH THIS ART, 3) WHY IS MY CAR SO LOWWWWW 😦 # IF YOU CAN’T PASS #1 THEN GO PARK AND WALK#
2. IF APPROACHING THE INCLINE FROM THE LEFT SIDE OF VEHICLE, APPROACH THE INCLINE AT AN ANGLE SO THAT THE LEFT TIRE CLIMBS THE INCLINE FIRST.
3. FOLLOWING THIS, BEGIN TO TURN YOUR STEERING WHEEL SLOWLY SO THAT YOU CAN GUIDE THE RIGHT TIRE ON TO THE BUMP. (THIS IS THE MOST CRUCIAL STAGE SO TAKE YOUR TIME) FOR SPEED BUMPS YOU HAVE TO MAKE SURE THE RIGHT TIRE (OR LEFT IF YOU STARTED WITH THE RIGHT TIRE) ADVANCES ON THE BUMP BEFORE THE LEFT TIRE CLEARS THE WHOLE SPEED BUMP
4. FOR THOSE NOT GOING THROUGH A SPEED BUMP, YOU SHOULD BE SAFE. HOWEVER BE CAREFUL, IF THE HILL IS TO STEEP AND YOU HAVE A STIFF SUSPENSION SET UP ONE SIDE OF THE REAR WHEELS MIGHT BE SLIGHTLY OFF THE GROUND. THIS MAY CAUSE YOU TO GET STUCK ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE A REAR WHEEL DRIVE RIDE. (NOT AS DRAMATIC AS PHOTO)

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5. CONTINUING ON WITH THE PERSON STUCK AT THE SPEED BUMP, AS YOU APPROACH THE HALFWAY MARK WE GO BACK TO STEP ONE OF THIS MANUAL. (PAY ATTENTION TO EXHAUST CLEARENCE, SWAYBARS, AND SIDESKIRTS) USUALLY THE REAR ISN’T AS LOW AS THE FRONT, BUT WITH THE CURRENT STANCE MOVEMENT CARS I MAY BE WRONG.

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6. IF YOU HAVE LOW SIDESKIRTS OR YOUR REAR IS LOW AS WELL, TRY TO CLEAR THE SPEED BUMP IN AN ANGLE AFTER YOUR FRONT RIGHT TIRE (IN THIS SITUATION) CLEARS THE SPEED BUMP. SO YOU WOULD TRY TO GET THE LEFT REAR TIRE TO CLIMB THE BUMP BEFORE THE RIGHT. IF YOU DON’T HAVE LOW SKIRTS OR A SIGNIFICANTLY LOWER REAR YOU SHOULD BE FINE EXITING. (WARNING: YOU WILL GET STUCK ON THE SPEED BUMP IF YOU ARE TOO LOW TO CLEAR IT WITHOUT DOING AN ANGLE APPROACH FROM THE REAR AS WELL.
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TIPS: DO NOT APPROACH THE BUMP TOO FAST UNLESS YOU ARE POSITIVE YOU CAN MAKE IT. 2.) ITS EMBARRASSING TO GET STUCK, BUT MORE SHAMEFUL TO DAMAGE YOUR CAR JUST BECAUSE YOU WANT TO GET OUT OF THE SITUATION (ITS YOUR CAR, NOT THE PEOPLE RECORDING). 3) ALWAYS THINK AND KNOW YOUR SITUATION AND SURROUNDINGS, THIS IS THE MOST CRITICAL. IF ITS A HIGH TRAFFIC AREA DON’T TRY TO CLEAR IT IF YOU AREN’T 95% SURE. 4) IF YOU GOT YOUR CAR INTO A CAR SHOW, YOU CAN GET IT OUT TELL PEOPLE TO MOVE CAUSE YOU HAVE TO DO THE TECHNIQUE!! 5) CARRY A SET OF TOOLS TO EASILY REMOVE PARTS (BUMPERS USUALLY) ITS CHEAP TO CARRY A RATCHET WRENCH OR SOMETHING WITH YOU FOR THAT ONE MOMENT. 6) FINAL TIP……YOU DID THAT TO YOUR CAR, IT SHOULD NOW BE A LIFESTYLE CHOICE….OR JUST GET AIR SUSPENSION.

HERE IS A VIDEO SHOWING SOME GOOD TECH

 

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